I find myself looking for someone like you but I realize my version of you is much sweeter. 12.21.18

That’s when I realized: I never fell in love with a real person. It was their potential… or who I would hope they’d become. I ignored red flags because I convinced myself that this person is evolving into the one I need them to be. Sounds self-centered, huh? That wasn’t my intention. If I can become the one you need, then why can’t you? Never mind that. I don’t need an answer. I don’t want an explanation. I really just want my time back but that’s a moot point. But wait, no…

You see, I’ve learned something about myself during what seemed to be a grand waste of time. This is something I needed to know. I NEEDED to know this.

It’s just that… I long to love so badly, that I will love the wrong person, intentionally.

Because the act of loving is cosmic and in this act I am in my essence – the only place I want to be.

I understand a little better now. The days of loving mirages are no more.

Zaira Viteria